Tickle Tickle

March of the Ants:

In my last house I had a rat problem. I could hear them running back and forth, scratching at the wood paneling, chasing one another and tumbling around, skweaking and fighting. I also had roaches, which were so big I think they were mice when I heard them scampering around on the floor or in my dresser.

In my new house I still have some roaches, and they still sound like small mice…which is why I keep a can of Raid next to my bed. However I have discovered I may have an ant problem as well.

For the second time, there were so many ants (HUGE ants btw)crawling in the ceiling above my bathroom that they started falling through the cracks. It’s raining ants hallelujah, it’s raining ants. They made me think of the computer game Lemmings…Fall, and walk and walk and walk.

I’ve already dealt with a ceiling that did let actual rain on me during bad weather, but I think the ants are a little more off-setting.

I took my can of Raid, designed for roaches, but has proven itself on crickets, ants, grasshopper, etc and I sprayed into the ceiling. I then heard the sound of THOUSANDS of tiny feet scuttling on the wood above me. The ants continued to fall out of the ceiling but they were writhing around instead of walk, walk, walking.

I avoided the bathroom for the rest of the night and woke up to carnage the next morning. Impressive. No pitter patter of little feet since then.

This little incident however, does not compare to the first night I stayed in my new house.

Prequel: March of the Spiders:

Carly was still living in the house when I moved in; she had about a week left but my host family needed me to leave to make room for the new renters they had found. I set up my mattress on a tarp on the garage floor and laid down to go to sleep.

After a little while I felt something on my arm, figured it was a mosquito, smashed it, the tickle went away, and I went back to trying to sleep. A minute or two pass and I start to feel the tickle again, smack, tickle goes away….tickle tickle….I turn on my flashlight and see that the perp is a small, almost transparent spider, smack. Tickle tickle. WTF! Another spider! So I take my flashlight and shine the beam down the length of my body and mattress. Dozens of little transparent spiders are crawling all over me and the bed. EEEEK!!!!

After quickly getting out of bed and brushing off the spiders I can see, I go to Carly’s bedroom and ask if I can sleep in the queen-sized with her. After she removes the spiders on my back and in my hair, we try to go to bed again.

I felt phantom tickle tickles all night long.