Monday, July 20, 2009

The adventures of Medical Mary

We get really good health care in the PC. I mean really really good. We have a doctor and nurse on call 24/7. The doctor’s name is Luis. We found out recently that he was also Mr. Paraguay in 2004. He is also the only person I’ve ever met, other than little children, who I can genuinely say is bashful. He blushes or gets uncomfortable very frequently, usually because of the comments of his counterpart, Medical Mary. However he even gets a little uneasy when some of the female volunteers have to remove a few layers of clothing from their arm to get a shot. You’d think they were actually disrobing in front of him. Personally I just make sure that I wear short sleeves and an easy to remove jacket on shot days to help the man out.

Medical Mary is our nurse who is quickly gaining a reputation for her Maryisms. She served as a PC volunteer when she was 40 but has served as a nurse for the PC all over the world since then. She has this awesome, dead pan manner of delivering lines that you just wouldn’t expect from a professional woman of her age. Most of these are ‘you had to be there’ moments, but I’ll post them anyway and try to keep a running list.

During our safe sex lecture…
Mary: ‘Does everyone know how to use a dental dam?’
*Carrie coughs
Mary: ‘Oh well then *puts her face into the dental dam and demonstrates its usage with her tongue
(She was totally just looking for an excuse to do it)

Mary, commenting mostly towards our four volunteers who are retired from their professions in the states, informed us that she too had lots of sex during her volunteer time even though she was 40 and didn’t expect anyone to be interested in her.

During our sexual/physical assault lecture-July 1, 2009
Mary: But if its hot outside and you’re wearing your ‘come fuck me shorts’…
(Ironically a girl was definitely wearing her special shorts at a birthday party so we all had a frame of reference for her comment)

Mary: And there was the guy who wanted to have hot sex with me…
*side conversation breaks out in the class about whether she really did say ‘hot sex’
Mary “Yes, I said hot sex..”

1 comment:

Kathy said...

Wow did know what that was and could have gone a life time not knowing.